Ballad of Binder Twine

Well there’s one great invention it is my intention
In song for to mention so listen a while
With mighty potential in fact ‘tis essential
To carry it with you whatever your style.
For farming ‘twas made but ‘twill suit any trade
It comes in three colours of simple design
You may cut it to size when the need it arises
This mighty invention they call binder-twine.

Well it may be amusing to find me enthusing
This subject I’m choosing in verse and in rhyme
But I think ‘tis a scandal the wheel or the candle
Had no song to praise them when firstly designed.
They have wrote about engines of great complications
There are thousands of books by professor Einstein
But I cannot relate to his complex equations
I’d rather be praising the ould binder twine.

Well you’ve heard of the builders of Egypt’s great pyramids
How they struggled for ages on those steep inclines
How those rocks of great tonnage they shifted with courage
And shoved them and pushed them ‘till they were in line.
‘Twas the slaves done the labour all chained up together
With the weight of those chains sure they must have been crying
Oh! They would have worked faster if only their masters
Had tied them together with light binder twine.

Well excuse my transgression but I have been digressin’
Now I have a confession and it is no lie
For last year on the road between home and Listowel
Sure my fan-belt gave o'er and herself she did sigh
But they say for repairing this great complication
A good pair of tights sure ‘twill do it just fine
Ah! but herself did’nt have hers on this sad occasion
So I had to replace it with ould binder twine.

Well one final dimension of this great invention
‘Tis used as prevention by farmers for gates
Well the cows they respect it and the crows they detect it
And never will cross it for fear of their fate
For tying in a hound or for squaring out ground
Or for holding up trousers that are in decline
Such versatile uses are surely exclusive
To that mighty invention they call binder twine.

Binder Twine, better known now as Baler twine has been a very useful item to farmers. Even veterinary surgeons find it very useful during difficult calf births!. I wrote this in the early 1980's and rather than list endless uses of Binder Twine a certain amount of fiction is introduced.